What a Difference Two Weeks Makes

I had a different lady in my house today...She looked like my mom, was still confused like my mom, but was so alert and talkative! She slept all night and around 9 am I heard her stirring in her bed, so I opened her door and she looked at me and said , "Well, hi honey, I wondered where I was at." I sat and talked to her for a few minutes, told her I was going to make her breakfast, so she sat up in her bed and waited for me to come back to get her after I got breakfast ready. She told the dog that "Debbie is going to make your breakfast too." So I know she knew who I was. She ate okay, but not great...but she did drink some Sunny D and a glass of water. I am trying to push water, water, water because of the UTI. Thanks to Kristen, I know now not to give her orange juice or anything citrus with the UTI. I do know that she drank about 4 glasses of OJ at the nursing home. After breakfast she was ready to watch tv (game shows) and as long as I was in her sight, she would talk to me. Sometimes I sit behind her chair on the couch and she can't see me and forgets I'm in the room! The home health aide came out and bathed her and got her dressed, while I ran to the store for a few more things. (Eggs are hard to keep in the house now.) When I returned after about an hour, I made her lunch and she ate all of it and asked for more chicken (first time she asked for more!) She had her usually potty time after lunch and then said she would like to lay down for awhile. She walked in her room, pulled her covers down and crawled in to bed. I think she was asleep before her head hit the pillow. She slept for a couple of hours, and then I heard her open the door to her room. She came walking out with her shoes on and said, "Hi Honey, I wondered were you were." She wanted to watch more tv, so we watched the Waltons...she kept trying to get me to turn it by saying, "If you don't want to watch this you can turn to whatever you want." I guess she was getting sick of the Waltons! She ate a good supper, had a piece of cake and sat at the table watching me craft again. Around 8 pm she said "I could just go to sleep right here." I asked her if she wanted to go to bed and she said yes. I took her to the bathroom, got her in her gown, she walked to her room and went to bed! Now I don't know why the turnaround and if it is only temporary, but I do believe she has been sick with this UTI for awhile. She never had a fever and I didn't notice anything different with her than I had seen in the nursing home for awhile. I feel bad to know that she was here for two weeks before I noticed she was ill. Well, I didn't notice it...she just couldn't get out of bed! She still thinks this is her house at times and can't figure out how I get in, she still looks outside and thinks she sees snow on the ground, she still thinks her bedroom closet is her bathroom, but today for the first time she was more able to communicate with me than she has for quite sometime. So tomorrow morning, I hope that strange lady that I call Mom is still here! And still wants to talk, because I love having her here to talk to. Like I said, what a difference two weeks makes!

Bump in the Road

We didn't make it to the doctor today...but we got a ride to Ball Hospital! I went in this morning to get Mom up and get her ready to go to her doctor's appointment. I asked her if she wanted to go to McDonald's and she said that sounded good. But, when I asked her to get up, she told me her back hurt. Well, as you know, we have all heard that before! I then asked her if I could help her sit up. But when I tried, she cried out, no, no, my back, it hurts. She was lying flat on her back and really couldn't move. I could tell she was trying, but it was just too painful. Okay, now what do I do? I called her doctor, and they suggested just calling an ambulance if I couldn't get her sit up. Called 911 where they determined she wasn't in distress, so they called "the Sheriff's Ambulance". I'm sure that means something, I just don't know what. Anyway, the paramedics came, assessed her, gave her a shot of Demerol, put her on the gurney and took her to the hospital. I followed them there and on the way called Barry, who met us out there. To make a long story short, she has a urinary tract infection. The doc said that would cause her back pain. He gave her 5 days of antibiotic and said to have her drink lots of water. She loved the doctor...As soon as he came in she wanted to hug him, then while he was examining her she pulled him over and kissed the top of his head, looked at him and said...do you want to lay down with me? I thought Barry and I were going to lose it!! She is absolutely adorable sometimes! Anyway, I got her home, took her to the bathroom and she went in her room and sat on the bed. I didn't want to give a a lot to eat, she "sort of" threw up in the car on the way home. So she had a few saltine crackers and a "sippy cup full of water." She doesn't do well with a straw anymore, and she gets choked just drinking from a glass, so I tried one of Cabot's sippy cups. I took the valve out, so the water would come out easily. It worked! She drank almost a full glass. I started this post at 10 pm, but got tired and fell asleep. She was sleeping then and now at 5 am, I am finishing this and she is still sleeping. I am going to reschedule her doctor appointment today, because I want him to still see her. Then he can make sure her infection has cleared up. I guess we will hit bumps sometimes. I thought yesterday, as she was lying in bed here at home, that we were going to have to put her back in the nursing home. That was before we found out in was just what it was. I was thinking she had a severe back problem, that I wouldn't be able to handle her. But it turned out to be just a bump. I hope we stay on a smooth road for awhile!

Our First Outing

Yes, we are going to venture out today...not because I really want to , but Mom has a doctors appointment at 1 pm. It should, at the least, be interesting! I think we will stop and eat lunch somewhere. I can't get the wheelchair in my car, so I'm not sure how this is going to turn out. I do have her walker, she can sit on it and I can push her, but not through parking lots, etc. We'll manage...I am sure she will be so tired when we get home that she will sleep for hours!
Speaking of sleeping, she is still in la la land...I think this is night 3 or 4 where she has slept without getting up. Well, if you can count yesterday, when Tim got up at 6 am and looked in at her. She was on her knees by the side of the bed. It brought back memories of when as a child I would look in her and dad's room and they would be by their bedside, praying. Well, I don't think that was Mom's intentions this time. She must have slide out of bed and got in that position. I know she hadn't been there long, I had just looked in on her at 5 pm. Anyway, Tim got her back in bed and she went back to sleep for 3 more hours. She was really out of it yesterday afternoon, but I discovered something important. If I respond to her with agitation, she picks up on that and responds in the same way. If I can just walk away and stay calm, then she, in turn, stays calm. Learning everyday!

What is Normal?

When Mom was in the nursing home she was sleeping alot. I would get so upset, because I figured no one cared enough to turn on her television or motivate her mind. I decided that I would let her watch games shows and the Waltons, and that I would try to spend time with her helping her look at pictures, etc. That seemed to work for a few days. Today, she is back to sleeping. She didn't get out of bed until 11:30 although I tried to get her up earlier. Needless to say when she did get up, her clothes were soaked and her bed needed changed. I had to bathe her before she could even eat. I fixed spaghetti and garlic bread and gave her a good portion. I went about my business, I moved her bedroom around, stripped the bed, washed a load of clothes and loaded the dishwasher. It took her awhile, but she ate every bite! But she just doesn't seem too perky today. I had her sit in her chair to watch Let's Make a Deal, and she fell asleep immediately. I think she may have a cold, she goes to the doctor tomorrow. That should be fun! Anyway, I am still searching for the answer to that question "What is Normal?" Maybe, wacked (sorry, one of my favorite words) is her normal. Sometimes I think its mine!

Learning Process

Well, my fault I guess. I let Mom stay up until 10:30 pm. She was watching the Waltons and kept telling me she wanted to finish watching the show. Okay, nice guy that I am, let her stay up. She is, after all, 81 years old! BIG MISTAKE! When she gets very tired, she gets very uncooperative. No, she wasn't going to bed right then- no, she wasn't going to use the bathroom- and no, she wasn't putting on her gown, she was sleeping in her clothes. Guess who won? For you who know me, you may think I did, but NO, she won! I tried reasoning, threats (I am calling the doctor and he will come over and make you go to the bathroom and charge you lots of money). I tried pouting (never worked for me as a kid, either). So, she laid down in her bed, covered herself up, and was asleep before I even left the room. She did try to keep her shoes on, but I won that one! Other than that, we had a real good night. She had grilled cheese and chips for supper, that is her light meal of the day. She ate every single bite! She took her pills, but never really understands why she has to take them. She talked to Tim for a minute and watched me work on a photo calendar. She seems to enjoy sitting at the table. I put "stuff" in front of her that she can "mess" with. She likes to fold and refold things. Maybe I should give her my laundry to fold! Anyway, I have a feeling that taking care of Mom will continue to be a learning process. That's okay. We should never stop learning!

A New Day

I woke up at 4 am this morning...after sleeping for about 5 hours. That is plenty of sleep for me, I don't require too much! Mom got up this morning at 8:30 am, ready to eat breakfast. She knew who I was and sat at the table while I got breakfast ready. She ate a little over 2 scrambled eggs and two pieces of toast and jelly and drank a good size glass of juice. She took her pills, with hesitation and agreed to let me clean her up. So, after her bath, I got her dressed and she is now sitting in her room watching the Waltons. (As you can see by the picture, she fell ASLEEP watching the Waltons!) She usually takes a little catnap around this time. The problem is when she wakes up, I never know what she will be like. Sometimes she's very confused after a nap. Then we just start over again! There is one thing about this staying at home with her...It never gets boring! Well, this morning was a new day, now after nap, it may be ANOTHER new day!

Trying to Understand

I spent a few hours searching the Internet for an acceptable technique, a well-kept secret or just some useful pointers to help me know how to care for someone with Alzheimer's. I wanted to find a list, numbered from 1 to whatever, of things that I could say or do in certain situations. I found out that all Alzheimer patients are not created equal. I found out that whatever I do, well, is hit and miss. I found out that what might work today, has no chance of working tomorrow. I found out that, like the name of this blog, every moment truly is a new one. Not only for Mom, but for her caregiver. I found out that it doesn't do either of us any good for me to get visibly upset. I have learned that lying to someone with Alzheimer's sometimes in the only way to get them to cooperate. Like telling Mom that if she doesn't let me change her Depends and the sheriff finds out, he will probably write her a ticket! She understood that and let me change them. I found out that a sense of humor is the only way I am going to make it through this. I find myself laughing at some of the crazy things I tell her, because if someone would say those things to me, I would think they were insane! But to her, those things make perfect sense. So, I have come to the conclusion that I can stop trying to understand. There are some things that are beyond understanding. Alzheimer's must be one of them.