Okay, everyone's blogging...I never thought I would, though. Don't have enough time, don't have enough to say...Don't have anything interesting to blog about. But then, 11 days ago, I found a most interesting subject...my mom. For those of you who don't know, my mom has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease, a most interesting, yet heartbreaking illness. As a little background information, about 4 years ago, (time is kind of fuzzy), mom had a car accident. She totaled her car driving home from church. She couldn't tell anyone exactly what happened, although, it was a one car accident. She hit a utility pole dead center with her car. Didn't try to brake, and didn't slow down. She wasn't hurt, but we took her to the emergency room at the insistence of her insurance company. The hospital ran several tests, and came back with the information that at some point in the past, she had a slight stroke and that the arteries in her brain were narrowing. The emergency room doc said that she should never drive again. Her kids, who knew that she probably shouldn't have been driving anyway, were quite relieved. We didn't have to take her car away (it was unfixable anyway) the doc said she couldn't drive. She didn't like that one little bit! We tried to take her places, made sure she had food, took her to get her hair done, but she was never happy about her car not being in her driveway! She eventually quit talking to me about her car, because in her mind, I was the one that wouldn't let her drive! Anyway, every chance she got- my brother, sister, their spouses, the grandkids, her siblings, the neighbors, the clerks at any given store heard the story of how she didn't have her car because her daughter wouldn't let her drive! It bothered me at first...then it became comical. Anyway, after a long while, she quit talking about her car as much. (Even though she did mention a couple days ago that she didn't have a car.) She lived alone and her life was watching tv, reading and doing "circle words." The family tried to make life as normal for her as we could, but things just weren't adding up. Simple things, like doing the few dishes she had and running the washing machine had become things of the past. We noticed she was becoming more and more...well, we called it eccentric. There were things in the fridge that shouldn't have been there and things that should have been in the fridge that were sitting out. I took the knobs off her gas stove, fearing she would set the place on fire. That wasn't cruel...she never used the stove, unless she wanted to get warm! She had no concept of putting on a sweater or covering up with a blanket.
Things were getting worse and we feared for her safety. At that point, we felt that she just needed some assistance in doing some things. Like making sure she took her medicine and took the correct amount. My brother and sister-in-law had taken on the job of going over twice a day to give her meds to her. We were afraid she would accidently overdose herself. So we talked about it and made the decision to place her in assisted living. We thought she was adapting to that, but she then stopped eating. She lost almost 20 pounds. Her doctor didn't seem too concerned. Then the day came when I got a call that she had fallen in her room. The aides thought she had gotten up too quickly. I made the decision to call an ambulance and have her taken to the hospital. While she was there, they found her blood count very low. She was there for, I believe 5 or 6 days. The doc told us that she needed to be in a nursing home with 24 hour care. So my brother and I found one that we "liked" and that's were mom stayed for a little over 3 months. The doc on call there, prescribed a medicine that increased her appetite. She had started eating more. But everytime I stopped to see her, she was in her room, in bed, asleep. She couldn't remember how to turn the tv on, so she just slept. Something in the back of my mind was gnawing at me...I just didn't know what it was. Then one day I walked in to the business office to get the paperwork to apply for Medicaid, when the lady said to me that my mom was not there for medical reasons, she was there for custodial purposes. I other words, we were just leaving mom there, because we couldn't care for her. I left with the unfinished paperwork, and alot of thoughts going through my mind. I had just started a new job that I loved. But it didn't seem right to me. My mom was just sleeping her life away, while I was working...that didn't make sense. I was told that she didn't know some of the family, and I wasn't at all sure that she knew me all the time. I had decided that I was going to go see her and if she knew me, I was taking her out of there and moving her home with me. I walked in while she was eating, she looked at me, said "Hi, Honey" and started talking about her food. She calls everyone "honey", so I just figured I was just other face. But then she said to me "What are you going to do when you leave here?" I told her I was going to work. She replied, "Oh, I thought maybe we could run around like we used to." I knew right then, she knew exactly who she was talking to! I said to her that I would be right back, and walked to the nurses station. I looked at Wendy, her nurse, and said, "I want to take my mom home." She started to tell me about how to sign her out for the day and I said, "No, I want to take my mom home permanently."
Now, it's the beginning of the 11th day. I have no regrets. I am a little tired, but we are learning to get into a routine. It's like having a baby or toddler around. Sleep when they sleep. Okay, I am relearning how to care for someone who needs lots of care. But I wouldn't trade these first 11 days for anything.
Things were getting worse and we feared for her safety. At that point, we felt that she just needed some assistance in doing some things. Like making sure she took her medicine and took the correct amount. My brother and sister-in-law had taken on the job of going over twice a day to give her meds to her. We were afraid she would accidently overdose herself. So we talked about it and made the decision to place her in assisted living. We thought she was adapting to that, but she then stopped eating. She lost almost 20 pounds. Her doctor didn't seem too concerned. Then the day came when I got a call that she had fallen in her room. The aides thought she had gotten up too quickly. I made the decision to call an ambulance and have her taken to the hospital. While she was there, they found her blood count very low. She was there for, I believe 5 or 6 days. The doc told us that she needed to be in a nursing home with 24 hour care. So my brother and I found one that we "liked" and that's were mom stayed for a little over 3 months. The doc on call there, prescribed a medicine that increased her appetite. She had started eating more. But everytime I stopped to see her, she was in her room, in bed, asleep. She couldn't remember how to turn the tv on, so she just slept. Something in the back of my mind was gnawing at me...I just didn't know what it was. Then one day I walked in to the business office to get the paperwork to apply for Medicaid, when the lady said to me that my mom was not there for medical reasons, she was there for custodial purposes. I other words, we were just leaving mom there, because we couldn't care for her. I left with the unfinished paperwork, and alot of thoughts going through my mind. I had just started a new job that I loved. But it didn't seem right to me. My mom was just sleeping her life away, while I was working...that didn't make sense. I was told that she didn't know some of the family, and I wasn't at all sure that she knew me all the time. I had decided that I was going to go see her and if she knew me, I was taking her out of there and moving her home with me. I walked in while she was eating, she looked at me, said "Hi, Honey" and started talking about her food. She calls everyone "honey", so I just figured I was just other face. But then she said to me "What are you going to do when you leave here?" I told her I was going to work. She replied, "Oh, I thought maybe we could run around like we used to." I knew right then, she knew exactly who she was talking to! I said to her that I would be right back, and walked to the nurses station. I looked at Wendy, her nurse, and said, "I want to take my mom home." She started to tell me about how to sign her out for the day and I said, "No, I want to take my mom home permanently."
Now, it's the beginning of the 11th day. I have no regrets. I am a little tired, but we are learning to get into a routine. It's like having a baby or toddler around. Sleep when they sleep. Okay, I am relearning how to care for someone who needs lots of care. But I wouldn't trade these first 11 days for anything.
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