One Day at a Time

Well, a couple of nights ago I was ready to send Mom back to the nursing home! Sleeping pills didn't really help her sleep, but they sure did add to her already confused state of mind. Wednesday night she woke up at around 2 am and was looking for the bathroom. She wouldn't let me help her, didn't want me to touch her. I finally got her in to the bathroom, where she refused to sit on the toilet, and try to get on the sink. I knew that the sleeping pills had her so confused. She told me she would wait for Debbie to help her. I said I am Debbie! The blank stare said it all. It was a struggle, but I finally got her back to bed, practically having to pick her up to put her in bed. I tucked the blankets between the matress and the box springs, so it would be a litlle harder for her to get up and went into the living room and cried. What have I done? What made me think that I could do this? I know that there are lots of people praying for me (maybe they are more praying for Mom!), but I just felt at peace. I didn't know what I was going to do different, but I knew it would be okay. A few hours later, Mom woke up, got up and allowed me to help her to the bathroom. She then ate a good breakfast and we continued our daily routine. Tim's mom came and stayed with her for a couple of hours so I could just get out of the house. I had a great time at the Dollar Tree and McDonalds! I would have gone to see Tim and eat lunch with him, but he was gone. Mom took a little catnap while I was gone and another one right before supper. After we ate, I set at the table with her and worked on a flip photo album. I cut, glued, etc while she watched and talk a little. Then I played a cd that Jeremy had made a few years ago. There are two songs on the cd that he sings and they just happen to be songs Mom knows, Because He Lives and Farther Along. So for three hours we sit at the table and sang along with those two songs that she knew. I just set the songs on repeat, so I am sure we sang those two songs at least 20 times each! I kept asking her if she were tired and she would say, no, I'm just watching you. So at around 9:30 pm, I got her gown on her and helped her in to bed. NO SLEEPING PILLS! It is now 5 am and I haven't heard a peep from her! Well, I have a baby monitor in her room, so I do hear her breathing and sometimes snoring! So, I am hoping today is good for her. I would like to take her out and let her do "the Dollar Store!" That was one of her favorite places in the whole world to go! I could take her to Florida and that's were my mom, my sister and I would end up. Any store that had the word "Dollar" in it! So here I am, taking this one day at a time. I guess that all any of us do, isn't it?